Gurudev builds bridges yet again !
We are a mirror of the society. We get affected by whatever is in the collective consciousness of the society and we can make an impact on it too. Ukraine is going through a huge crisis and Art of Living is not unaffected by it. Of the several teachers doing great work in Ukraine, there was a conflict between two well meaning, well intentioned, dedicated teachers.
They both arrived
in the German Ashram and didn't want to see each others faces. The signature
smile of Art Of Living was replaced with anger and frustration.
To put it simply,
they didn't look like happy people, let alone Art Of Living teachers!
All the efforts of
our international coordinator, the international traveling teacher mentoring
Ukraine,to mediate and make peace had failed. Any effort to bring them together
only became worse.
In the German
ashram, as elsewhere, Gurudev usually meets people in their country groups and
listens to their issues and requests. In this case both
these teachers did not want to see each other and be in the same room. They
pleaded for a separate time with Gurudev.
They had intense
interpersonal problems, and the mistrust, anger and hatred was very palpable.
Very patiently
Gurudev invited one teacher to meet him first, then the next and then both
together. What lasted for over an hour were conversations fraught with
accusations, high emotions, tears, dis belief and mistrust. The way Gurudev
handled it, at the end of the meeting both the teachers were hugging each other
and promising each other of their support. Tears of sadness were transformed
into tears of love and gratitude.
I got 5 very very
valuable leadership lessons from the way Gurudev conducted this meeting.
1) Listen
100%
Though both the
teachers kept talking about many minute details, some of which didn't make too
much sense sometimes, Gurudev just listened. He didn't rush them,didn't
interrupt them, didn't stop them or question them. He just let them talk and
let off their steam. He just kept asking them to share more and listened
intently. By the end of 15- 20 minutes that each of them spoke, they had
nothing more left to speak and looked visibly relieved already!
Leadership learning -
Expect differences of opinions and conflicts. When your team brings them to
you, let them let out their steam. 50 % job is done already!
2) Don't judge or
take sides
Not once in that
one hour, did Gurudev judge either of the teachers or take sides. Even when
what they spoke was totally opposite to each other, he did not think of one as
good and the other as bad. One as right and the other as wrong. In fact,
on a couple of occasions he appreciated each teacher to the other and the work
they were doing. So both teachers could see that they were both doing good
and important work for the organization .I could see, both teachers felt
heard fairly and that itself kept the communication going!
Leadership learning-
Don't judge or take sides in a conflict situation. A leader has to be
neutral. By this, both sides will be able to bring their full case to the table,
which is the only way the conflict can be potentially resolved.
3) Show that you
care
Emotions ran high
in this meeting. Gurudev, through his body language, concerned looks,
compassionate approach showed how much he cared. He was passing around tissues,
offering water, really being like a loving parent. Both the teachers were
perfectly natural in their behavior and the warmth started blossoming between
them too!
Leadership Learning- Even
the best people in your team can have a bad day, a misunderstanding. If you
show you care, they can overcome it.
4) Give a bigger
vision
After listening
and acknowledging their problems and challenges, Gurudev assured them of
support and of finding a solution. He also gave them a bigger vision of how
they have the responsibility of spreading happiness in their country and
uplifting people. He said, people are waiting for you, so don't get caught in
small little things. Think big, meditate. Things will resolve with time. He
gave them such a big vision, that they themselves said that their disagreements felt like small things!
Leadership Learning- It
is possible your team gets caught in small things and loses sight of the bigger
goal. The biggest role of a leader is to keep uplifting his team
towards this big goal !
5) Give Time
Despite being so
busy, Gurudev spent over an hour with these two teachers! Not once did he rush
them or let them feel what a tight schedule he has!
Leadership learning -
Your team needs you, your time. Giving your time at the right time, can save
many a disaster of later.
Two teachers who
refused to be in each others company, left hand in hand with an inspiration for
a better life. They left with strength, love and peace in their heart.I am so
grateful to have been in the room to silently witness this amazing
transformation. I learnt, what no book or professor could have taught me. Hope
this note inspires you to take better leadership action too!
P.S – When I read this
article to Gurudev, he actually suggested changes to it ! So not only did I get
a leadership lesson, but also a lesson on how to write about it !!
Thank You Rajita through we could know what Gurudev said.A must read for every leader.
ReplyDeleteThanks Viashali ! If we take knowledge out of every situation, even a challenge becomes a learning. Isnt it?
DeleteGurudev !!
ReplyDeleteThnks a lot fr sharing
Thanks Akhil.
Deleteamazing... wonderful... awesome !!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Avesh. Appreciate your compliments.
DeleteGreat share and inspiring :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Rajat. I am glad it the note inspired you.
Deletegreaaaaat
ReplyDeleteThanks Anjali !
DeleteSo nice :) Thanks for sharing! JGD!
ReplyDeleteThanks Mini ! Glad you enjoyed it.
DeleteI had already registered for a leadership webinar titled "managing attitudes to leadership"organised by RACMA ( Royal Australasian College of Medical Administrators) . After reading this, I have decided not to attend the webinar tomorrow. I have learnt a lot about "compassionate leadership and conflict resolution" .
ReplyDeleteOur boss definitely knows it all guys :)
Wow Anand. Thats quite something ! I shared this comment of yours with Gurudev.
DeleteThanks for sharing, helps for us to overcome our differences and also helps me to be a better leader and to think of the big picture.
ReplyDeleteYes.Thank you.
DeleteThanks for sharing :-) jgd
ReplyDeleteThanks Nitin !
DeleteVery true
ReplyDeleteYes Sudarshan. Thanks
DeleteThanks a lot for sharing this !! :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks !
DeleteSo good !thanks much Rajithaji !
ReplyDeleteThanks Shashirekha. It was nice seeing you on the call on saturday!
DeletePlease keep sharing such lessons. :D Thank you so much.. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Vidit. Will do
DeleteJai Gurudev :)
ReplyDeleteJai Gurudev Chirag
DeleteVery practical and great lessons about leadership qualities...
ReplyDeleteThanks Jazbaat
DeleteGood Read!
ReplyDeleteAwesome experience and script writing... thanks a lot for sharing... :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing such a wonderful lesson, you're so lucky to witness the whole event, wish I could imbibe some of these qualities, could add some more meaningfulness to life :-)
ReplyDeleteLearnt so much .... Feeling so uplifted and inspired
ReplyDeleteThanks Seema ! Am glad it inspired you !
DeleteAwesome.. :)
ReplyDeleteVery well tackled SriSri his the Leader of the universe I am blessed to be devotee
ReplyDeleteYes Vishwas ! We are blessed to be devotees !
DeleteThank you for sharing! It's the most essential knowledge no B-School can teach, it's only possible to learn by observing one of the greatest leaders in world history. Blessed to be able to see Him in action.
ReplyDeleteThanks Suguna. I agree. We are truly blessed to be able to see Him in action!
DeleteHats off Rajita ji.....you picked and brought the Most sought after Leadership points..so simply & easily...even the world renowned Leadership Trainers are looking dwarf..
ReplyDeleteThanks Sarv. I am glad you found the article useful. Every moment with Gurudev is a learning experience. Its only upto us to imbibe and share.
ReplyDeleteRajitha, so grateful to you for sharing this amazing lesson.... feel uplifted and energized by this amazing learning...
ReplyDeleteSometimes when we go through situations and times which are way beyond the "ordinary" its easy to slip back...and then comes this knowledge and simple truths from a teacher extraordinaire and then your life is put back into its perspective...and then there is relief, a calm, a reassurance... How good is that feeling! And how beautiful is life!
ReplyDeleteThey always say keep smiling..when I read your articles I smile from within which makes my soul glow and everything looks so much brighter...humility, humility and gratitude, gratitude..thanks for sharing
ReplyDeleteLeena Sabharwal
A lesson in problem resolution, counselling, human relations and motivation at its best!
ReplyDeleteThank you.
Jai Gurudev....
ReplyDeleteits really amazing.... got so many answers...
Gurudev always answers our prayers... and our deep hidden fears n worries are removed effortlessly....
pranam..
WOW................thank u for sharing this......this is real education.....with first hand experience.......
ReplyDeleteDear Rajita. this blog came very handy to me to address a crisis I was a part of.
ReplyDeleteWell done!!! In very simple words you have conveyed the leadership qualities with complete depth. Thank you and keep writing! XO
Yes, Great Learning. In while doing resolution, Be 100%, Belonging, Non-Judgmental and create space of trust.
ReplyDeleteYes, Great Learning. In while doing resolution, Be 100%, Belonging, Non-Judgmental and create space of trust.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete